Hot Dips (littlewashu) wrote,
Hot Dips

I needs my sleep

So last night, Mitchell and I were pooped from an evening of yelling at each other -- it's what we do best. Well, fighting, and smoking. Are the two things we do best. Luckily the effects of the latter counteract those of the former and we're able to remain friends. So anyway -- oh! Hold up. Back that shit up . . . last night at around quarter to seven I went to take a quick, 30-minute nap. I laid down in my bed, to the stylings of . . . I don't know, of whatever the fuck is on Cartoon Network at quarter to seven.

This happens often. In the afternoon, one of my neighbors -- I think it's my downstairs one -- has the TV on REALLY FUCKING LOUD, and it's always on Cartoon Network. It's so loud that I can listen to the freaking shows, I swear to God. That's how I realized that Tenchi was back in the Toonami lineup, because I heard the end theme throuth the floor one time. And all those Cartoon Network sounds -- like the Toonami whirrrrrrr, and the Cartoon Cartoon "DUNH duh, dunh DUNH duh, dunh DUNH duh, DUNH DUNH! Cartoon cartoooon." Moderately amusing when I'm just figiting about in my room. NOT AT ALL AMUSING when I'm trying to take a freaking nap.

I actually had to get up and go sleep on the couch, cursing, but at the same time realizing that it was only early evening, and it should be okay to be kind of loud. Though I don't know how anyone could stand to be in the same room as that TV. It must be on in the bedroom downstairs, because you can't really hear it in my living room.

So cut to whatever time we decided to crash, I don't fucking know, eleven, twelve? We go to lay down, and the tv is still on. And it's still on Cartoon Network. Ponderous, fucking ponderous. We try to figure out where it's coming from; I put my ear to the floor, and to my back bedroom wall, and I can hear it through both. Downstairs is this lady . . . I'd say late fifties or so. She owns a disgustingly ugly Ye Olde English Bulldog or some shit -- and I'm the kind of asshole who thinks that ugly dogs are cute, but not this bitch. She's married (the lady, not her dog) to some guy named "Paul" who looks like he should own a Harley -- big beard, big gut, big tattoos, bandana -- but he wears glasses, too, and denim overalls, and he doesn't have a Harley. She kicked him out sometime last year (and then told me about it -- what am I supposed to say to that?), but then he was back for a few months, but then right before Christmas they had a huge fight or something, there was a lot of banging around downstairs and yelling, but I was high and alone and had NO idea what was going on, and then she drove off, and then the next day his truck was gone and he hasn't been back since. Phew! Was that a gossipy irrelevant tangent, or what?

Um . . . where the fuck was I? Oh yes, so we didn't know who it was coming from, but the lady's car wasn't there, so we figured it must be the side neighbor. They're at a totally different entrance, so I don't know anything about them. I banged on the wall, then a few minutes later Mitch banged too. Earlier in the evening I had stomped on the floor, so we should have had our bases covered. It did not end. We couldn't sleep. All I could think about was how loud the tv was and how it shouldn't be that loud. And also my mind kept trying real hard to figure out was was going on in the show, even though I didn't want to try and figure out what was going on in the show. We finally admitted we were not going to be able to fall asleep like that, and moved into the living room. I have a bed in there, but it's only a twin. Man, I do not know how I ever slept on a bed that small with another person on a regular basis. I couldn't move! And it was so hot! It was like this: wallmemitch ! With no spaces in between!

Somewhere around one-thirty we got woken up by a large bang. We didn't know what was going on; maybe the downstairs door slamming. Mitch stood up to check, and the bitch's car was back. A little later there was another really loud bang; if it was the door slamming, it was someone saying "I'm gonna slam this motherfucking DOOR!" because it was loud. Then we realized the tv was off; Mitch went into the bedroom to check for sure, and it was! So we moved back into the bedroom. Ah sweet relief. So cool and spacious.

So it was my downstairs neighbor lady, right? WHY DOES SHE LEAVE THE TEEVEE ON SO FUCKING LOUD WHEN SHE'S NOT HOME? And why always Cartoon Network? Is it for the DOG? Does the DOG like Dexter's Lab? Fucking hell. I . . . I think I'm going to write a note, but I'm a big fat pussy, so who knows. I feel bad for banging on my other neighbor's wall. I wonder why they didn't bang back.
Tags: crazy neighbors

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