We have this program called e/pop at work. It's like an instant messaging system. There's a chat function, but most of the time we just throw back messages to one another one at a time and reply, you know.
So ANYWAY, Ruth, the receptionist, and the person I'm the most friends with at work, e/pops me today to ask me to e/pop this guy Dave, who she was seeing, but they broke up, but they're kind of seeing each other now, but nobody's supposed to know, but everybody does . . . man, I'm not supposed to KNOW. And she has me doing these ridiculous things for God knows why, and I feel like a freaking idiot.
Ruth: u there?
me: yup, what's up, kid!
Ruth: I need a huge favor - really BIG!
me: uh oh. what is it?
Ruth: e-pop Dave a little later and ask him "u there" when he responds - ask him if he has talked to me yet. the reason being I want to invite everyone to Aerosmith's concert on September 13th - I have a friend at Ticketmaster. Kid Rock is opening and Run DMC is performing as well.
me: wait, what? i don't get it. when i say "have you talked to ruth yet?" and he says "no" -- what am i supposed to say? And why are we doing it this way? I'm so confused
Ruth: Duh! When he says no - say go talk to her - she has some awesome news. And we are doing it this way because i am inviting you too.
me: yeah, sure. i mean i'm still not clear on why a middleman is needed, but sure. and hey, thanks for inviting me, too!
Ruth: So you gonna go?
me: hmm, i'd have to think about it . . . the aerosmith and run dmc sound good, but the kid rock . . . ugh . . .
Ruth: Look - he is just opening for them - besides tickets are like $30.00 - what a steal and we get them cheaper thru my friend.
Anyway, try e-popping him now and let me know.
I need a middle man because he hasn't answered me from this morning.
I'm sorry, what grade are we in again? I seem to have forgotten. This woman is twenty-nine, for Pete's sake. She was married for five years. She has a kid. Shouldn't we be beyond the note-passing phase? Jeebus. I so do not want to be involved in this crap. And the reason they broke up was because he thought she had spilled the beans about them! How is THIS not looking suspicious? Jeezum Crow.