Last Friday -- not this past Friday, silly, the one before that, the 20th -- I got on a plane at eight in the morning. Mitchell drove me to the airport WAY before dawn, oh MAN was it dark out, so as thanks I cooked him breakfast in the morning. Five forty-five is early for so much bacon, and it made our tummies hurt a little, but it was still good.
I was torn up until the last second whether or not to check my bag -- "I'm going to check it, no, no, I'll take it as carry on, no, no, I'll check it" and in the end I decide to check it because I don't want to fucking have to deal with it, and then I saw it both loaded ONTO and then OFFFROM the plane, from my window, so my mind was at ease.
I like the taking off, I think it's scary, I think about all the things that could go wrong. I'm not scared to fly at all, not even a little bit, but my mind reminds itself that it SHOULD be thinking about all the things that could go wrong, LOTS of people are scared to fly, let's review again the reasons why. So take-offs are exciting, though not as exciting as landings.
Then in the beginning you can see neighborhoods and developments, and I critique their layout, as taught to me in Urban Planning by my snobby elitist I-don't-own-a-car-and-also-I-live-in-Pri
Then it gets all cloudy and boring and I discover that my $3.99 inflatable headrest was worth it definitely for sure ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzz.
Then they serve breakfast, and did I mention the flight wasn't even close to full? I'm not sure I've ever been on a flight that wasn't full before, but man was it fantastic. No one sitting next to me, so I could put my stuff on the seat. No one behind me, so I could recline without worry. And the food came fast.
While I was eating, I looked out the window. There was a soft carpet of clouds below us, way below us. And then I saw a speck! A dark speck, just above the carpet of clouds. Teeny tiny, a tinyster black speck, moving very very slowly, but very very straightly, towards the plane, but way underneath it. I was mesmerized. I was sure it was a UFO of some kind. I watched it carefully, and it moved slowly, but in such a straight line! So direct! It began to disappear under the plane, I had my forehead squished up against the window. Finally finally, just before it disappeared, its shape began to be discernible: it was a plane! A jet, just like the one I was in! I could see the wings!
Man, can you imagine how far BELOW us it must have been? To be "aligned" with us for so long, as we were zooming though the air at hundreds of miles an hour? To be nothing but a SPECK, a mere dot, a big huge plane reduced to a mere dot? We must have been SO HIGH UP. I'll tell you what man, airplanes still amaze me. That not only have we figured out how to fly, we can get HUNDREDS of people up in the air at the same time, we can feed them FRENCH TOAST and give them a decent bathroom and have them fall asleep and read and talk and watch movies! We can throw this huge piece of steel up in the air and it will stay there for HOURS at a time! Amazing, simply amazing. Teleportation should be right around the corner. I can't wait.
OH and then the mountains! Later I was awake again, for Coke and pretzels, and there were mountains outside, although I knew they weren't really mountains. The stupid flight attendant didn't know where we were. But they were beautiful, hills I guess, and you could see rivers, and farms, and how the rivers went through the mountains, and how the farms came up to the mountains and then had to stop, jagged edges. And the hills would turn into flat and then hills again and then REAL mountains, REAL ones this time with snow and everything, we don't have mountains where I come from, I would say that so many times. We don't have mountains. And then I thought of all the real mountains I had ever seen, and they are the Alps in Germany, and the green mountains in Vermont, and the ones in Virginia in Shenandoah which maybe are the Shenandoah mountains, or maybe they're the Appalachians or something, but those guys aren't like these mountains, these are real moutains, all jagged rock and snow and rock and MOUNTAINS and we don't have mountains where I come from. This is about the part where I started thinking "I love flying!" and I was on vacation and almost in Seattle where they have mountains, and then we came in over the city and there were highways and lakes and bridges and houses and schoolbuses and everything just gets bigger and bigger and then you land and then you're there.