June 14th, 2002

mr. robin

Award ceremony

Hey, everybody!

And now for the results of my Sunglasses Poll -- and the winner is . . . misterscarecrow! And honeybadger! I have seven pairs of sunglasses in my car. Plus one pair that was in the drawer of my desk here at work, but that wasn't the question, so. Congratulations, ScareCrow and rollergirl! INTERSTATE HIGH FIVE!

P.S. Oh, and everybody that voted, like, three and under? You're fools. How boring that would be! How un-poll-worthy! Sheesh.
mr. robin

(no subject)

Okay, real quick -- I've just been assigned a "rush job" which "has to be done by two" (I smell a lost lunch in there). It's to revise a REPORT for a project I HAVEN'T WORKED ON. A report. Give me some fucking drafting or some calculations or design, but what the fuck is up with these people putting me in charge of getting things completed where it would be a LOT EASIER AND FASTER if someone who was FAMILIAR with the fucking project was doing it. Jesus fuck. Or at least BRIEF me on the thing! Fuckers. Hopefully it'll help the day to pass, if I'm actually working. Fuckers.
mr. robin

The Story of the Blue Elephant

Kevin just wrote me to tell me that he was bored. He requested a story about a monkey. He got one.

And in case YOU'RE bored at work too, here y'go:

Once upon a time, there was a blue elephant. All the other elephants
made fun of him for being blue. Hence he was a sad and disconsolate
elephant.

He hung back from the . . . er, pack of elephants. Whatever a group
of elephants is called. If you've ever watched the Discovery
channel, you know that elephants have to trek to the mountains every
dry season to eat the trees that are still around. The bleu elephant
was weak and sad, though, and it didn't look he was going to make it
to the mountain. He sat down under a tree, and watched his family
grow smaller and smaller as they continued on without him.

Then the next morning he was awokened by a monkey, and HE was bright
blue! The monkey said, "yo dawg, what's up? Shouldn't you be
heading to the mountain?"

"Alas, my family has left me. For I am blue, and they make fun of me
and don't trust me and think that I don't belong. So I'm just going
to sit beneath this tree until I waste away. I imagine you have the
same problem I have, right, Blue Monkey?"

"Oh hells no! We monkeys are a silly bunch. Everybody LOVES that I
came out blue! I'm the most popular monkey in my . . . er . . . pack!
Shit, man, I'll get you some water, you can chill with us! They'll
LOVE you!"

So the elephant was happy. The blue monkey brought him some water,
and he was refreshed; and he went to live with the monkeys, and was
very popular and well-liked.

The end.